Friday, June 13, 2008

Overheard in a Target Fitting Room

Bitch #1: Oh Gaaawwd! It doesn't fit!

Bitch #2: Oh no! Why don't you try the zero?

Pause and shuffling:

Bitch #1: Still too big! I HATE all this stretch material - it's alway too big even when you get the smallest size!

Me: (in the next stall squeezing my ass into the largest "stretch" pants available, barely being able to zip them up, and sporting a five inch gap in the waistband above the butt.) (Sweating)

2 comments:

iMother2.0 said...

LOVE how you refer to them as Bitch 1 and Bitch 2.

I feel ya mama, I tried some pants on at Old Navy today. Let's just say the material was too thin and didn't hold anything in...they totally highlighted all my 'problem' areas.

I bought 3 skirts at Ross :)

Andrea said...

I used to be a bitch. A size 2 bitch.

Even after having two 9 pound babies, and this was before my postpartum 6 wk checkup, I was back in my size 2 jeans. That's the benefit of having 2 kids by the age of 20, your body springs right back, like a tight rubber band.

Fast forward 14 years later and I give birth again. So, I figured the same thing would happen with my last pregnancy. Wrong!

And I still weigh my almost full term #3 pregnancy weight.

My cousin and I love to compare cellulite and pot-belly stories now. LMAO.

What I would give to be a bitch again though.